Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
