how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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