Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
farters have to be the big spoon...
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
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Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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