Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
