I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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