he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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