I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
it glows. i had to have it.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
