the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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