I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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