I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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