ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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