I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
