And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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