I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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