I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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