So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
