Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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