Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize