She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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