if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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