It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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