don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize