Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
