I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
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