More tranny stories later!
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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