but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
