i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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