and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
