so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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