if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
wat bout pragnant strippers??
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
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