Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
why is half of my head shaved?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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