i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
