Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
