What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
