Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
