p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
