Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize