Umm I'm too high to move.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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