I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Randomize
