i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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