he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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