So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize