.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
