when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize