i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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