You really coming over, don't trick.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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