He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Randomize