i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
