Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
organizing the empties. That sober.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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