we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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