"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
