So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
